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Sunday, February 17, 2019

I don't know what to title this ...



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Introducing a prestigious guest blogger *drumroll* ……

My sister! The following are some daily family interactions from her point of view.* Enjoy!

*The following views are specifically those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of the blog editor. Believe at your own discretion.

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me: "for some reason my toe is itching."

sis: "you probably have athlete's foot."

me: "...and it's super awkward because it's hard to scratch there …."

sis: "athlete's foot. it's what you have. just sayin."

me: "...ANYway…"

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sister: "but see i'm showing you the way to become a good healthy woman by letting you wash the dishes. you'll thank me one day."



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me to my 3 year old nephew: "ok let's talk nicely to each other."

3 year old nephew: "but i can't!!!"

me: 0_0

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sister: "UGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THERE'S NO MORE OATMEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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mom: "ok i wrote down dad's number and my number and your sister's number and your sister's work number and dad's work number. if you need anything you can call me or dad or your sister. if the house burns down call 911 and then call your sister."

me: "so you ARE planning on coming back tomorrow, right?" 

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dad; *in the highest voice possible* "oh the lil coochie woochie Lightning Bolt!" (Lightning's our dog ehehe)

me: "singing opera over there, dad?"

sister: *chokes*

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sister: "i'm going to be a dried up moldy spinster."

me: "no worries! i'll find prince charming for you!!"

sister: "no thank you."

me: "do you really not trust my judgement??"

sister: "no."
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